This is my day:
- I plead with (or yell at) my children in the mornings to get ready to go because I have to be at work in 20 minutes.
- I compress my workday into exactly 8 hours (eating lunch at my desk) and rush home as soon as I can to make dinner. I do not stop on the way home to shop. I do not take the scenic route. I do not pass GO. I do not collect... okay, you get the point.
- After dinner I try to do something "fun" with the kids. Go for a walk. Go to the pool. Go to the park. Whatever. I want my kids to think I am capable of fun!
- Then, I try to cram in a 30 minute workout video. BECAUSE, you have to exercise, right? That's what we all say. Usually the kids stand next to me and ask for things: water, juice, cheese sticks, Popsicles, you name it.
- After this, they take a bath and I power-fold two loads of laundry and leave it stacked up all over the place, so that I can shut the water off because they are flooding the bathroom again.
- Then, they get in bed and I read 2-4 books to them (depending on how long it takes them to get ready), and then I lay with them until they go to sleep.
- Finally, at about 9:30 pm, I load the dishwasher and then collapse in my bed.
I honestly don't feel that stressed (only in the mornings!). I don't feel overwhelmed or exhausted. This is my life. I have made peace with the chaos.
My whole "personal" life is crammed into the 5 hours I have at home with my family after work.
I hear many stay at home moms say that they are stressed. I don't understand it, but I've never been a stay at home mom. In my mind, I think it would be great to stay home - you can go to the grocery store at 10 am, go to the park before it gets too hot, drink coffee out of a regular coffee cup instead of a travel mug, wear PJs as long as you want, and watch cartoons all morning (i.e., scroll through Pinterest). But everything I hear from SAHMs on the internet, through the grapevine, in magazines, etc., is how hard it is to stay home.
Is it possible that my forced work/home schedule actually reduces my stress? I am forced to move along at a certain pace until all the "things" are done... because if I don't, the "things" don't get done.
Perhaps when you stay at home all day, the day stretches out ahead of you like it will never end. And because it will never end, nothing ever HAS to get done.
Maybe the very thing that I used to feel guilty about - leaving my kids for 8 hours a day - is actually a blessing in disguise. Has it taught me to enjoy the moment? Has it kept me from wasting time? I think so. And now that I have realized this, I will keep enjoying the moment and I am more determined not to stress. I will take one moment at a time.
